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[nebroadwe]

Sniggled from Anime News Network:

Fullmetal Alchemist Quote Wins Marriage Proposal Contest

Hee! (Kind of a shame they had to take it back.)

Comments

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

*giggles*

Ed would be mortified.

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

I'll bet -- I can hear him now: "Who told them? Who told them?"

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

Figuring Al had a recording device at the train station or something....

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

When it was actually just Winry reporting the story to her grandmother ...

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

And Pinako laughing uproariously and saying Ed's marriage proposal was even worse than his dad's 'let's shack up' proposal...

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

Neither of them all that worried about the word getting out, when people began asking where Ed was off to now and whether he'd ever think of settling down ...

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

...and Ed finding out about it when his proposal is announced on a radio station...turned in by Mr. Coyle, the Rezembool train station's station master....

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

... who's going to wish he'd never been tempted by that 100,000 sen prize when the next train from the West gets in ...

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

...but at least, when Ed takes all the money back, he donates it to the Amestrian orphans fund....

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

... a charity supported by the Armstrong family for generations. "Edward Elric! Such magnanimity! Such kindness! I have seldom been so moved -- let me embrace you!"

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

"Gah! No! NO! It's not MY money! I'm just the distributor!" Ed fends off the official hug with a boot to Major Armstrong's face.

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

The major looks briefly nonplussed, then begins sparkling again. "Of course! My apologies to the donor -- but surely it was your impassioned rhetoric that persuaded him to open his heart to the children!" He seizes Ed in an affectionate headlock. "Come, you must meet with my mother. She's sponsoring a charity luncheon next week, under the auspices of the Daughters of Amestris, and has been on the catch for a guest speaker for some time ..."

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

"Oh, no. No no no. Absolutely NOT." Ed waved his hands in a negative manner. No way in hell was he getting up in front of people and talking. "I'll give you the name of the benefactor!"

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

"Now, now, Edward," Armstrong chides him as he begins dragging him along. "Modesty befits a great man, true, but think of the children! You cannot deny them the fruit of your talents!" He seems to swell with compassion, jacket straining across his shoulders.

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

"I AM NOT GIVING A TALK TO ANYONE!" Ed struggles, slipping his jacket and managing to make his escape.

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

As he runs, he hears the major's voice pursuing him, saying things like "true humility" and "model of public service" and "lecture tour" ...

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

"I'll let Al know!" Ed shouts over his shoulder, not about to get roped into something that crazy. He's done his time, thankyouverymuch.

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

The distraction isn't fatal, but it does mean he runs smack into Breda intstead of dodging around him. "Whoa, Boss!" the lieutenant exclaims. "Where's the fire?"

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

Fire? FIRE? "That's a great idea! Tell Mustang that he's needed by a woman. A needy woman." Ed thumps Breda on the shoulder and dodges around him quickly. "Major Armstrong can fill him in on the details!"

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

Breda dodges right back -- he's more agile than his bulk would suggest. "A needy woman? Major Armstrong?" He's not grinning, but Ed can hear the smirk in his voice. "Paternity suit, is it? I don't think Lieutenant Hawkeye would appreciate you trying to push that one off on the Colonel."

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

"Patern - ? No! Though I wouldn't put it past the bastard - No, it's right up his alley, schmoozing with women." Ed feints to the left, ready to go over, under or around Breda, by any way possible.

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

Breda isn't moved, neither by Ed's words nor his actions. "Nah, he's careful." He ruminates for a moment, or seems to. "Guess you didn't get that lecture when you joined up, being so li-- young and all."

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

"I got enough lectures." Ed glares at Breda. "Look, Winry's waiting. I need to get home, so I don't get another one."

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

Breda shrugs. "Don't let me keep you, then," he says, just as Major Armstrong drops a hand on each of Ed's shoulders.

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

Ed shows all of his teeth but somehow manages to speak almost pleasantly. "Winry needs me, Major. If you need a speaker, talk to him." He points at Breda.

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

"Nonsense!" booms the major. "But by all means, let us repair to Miss Rockbell's shop. Her distinguished charitable pedigree is an inspiration to us all." He turns to Breda, inclining his head courteously. "Perhaps you would care to accompany us, lieutenant? Colonel Mustang has not yet responded to my mother's invitation, but I'm sure if he knew that Edward were speaking ..."

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

Ed's brows lower. "So, you're willing to go all the way back to Rezembool with me to talk to Winry? That's...excessive, isn't it? When the bast - Mustang is here in town and would love to do a talk?"

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

For a moment it looks as if the major's enthusiasm will sweep all before it; then he reconsiders. "True, it would be a touch discourteous to drop in on Miss Rockbell all unannounced." He brightens. "We must telegraph ahead! Lieutenant, if you would be so good? I'm afraid I'll have to postpone my chat with the Colonel ..."

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

Breda's smirk would rival the bastard's, in Ed's opinion. "I'm sure I can do that for you, Major!"

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

Armstrong waves him a cheerful good-bye with one hand while taking an iron grip on Ed's arm with the other. It's impossible to tell whether said grip is the result of overwhelming bonhomie or tactical savvy (or something of both).

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

Ed gnashes his teeth quietly - he doesn't want to get dressed up and knows Winry will make him if Armstrong goes home with him. There has to be a way to escape this.

"Wouldn't you rather talk to the man who actually DONATED the money?!" Always worth a shot.

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

[OOC: I'll have no Internet till Sunday night, in case you're wondering where I went.]