Personal Note: Overheard at the Market

[nebroadwe]

I was buying raspberries at the market this morning when the following announcement interrupted the muzak:

If there is a professional corn-shucker in the store, please report to produce. Professional corn-shucker, please report to produce. Thank you.

And then we were back to random pop hits of the eighties and nineties. I lingered by the root vegetables for a few minutes, but if there were a cereal emergency in progress, it was too subtle for me to perceive. Hmm.

Comments

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

...Professional corn-shucker?

Oh, I'd have rushed over there just to see what the excitement is.

...and volunteered my services as a non-pro, just for the fun of it.

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

...and volunteered my services as a non-pro, just for the fun of it.

Why am I not surprised? :-) I didn't even think to present myself at the courtesy counter -- despite having grown up in corn country, I've never been that adept at dealing with the stuff.

I feel like I've been left with only half a story, though. Why did they need a corn-shucker? They had all these packages of nicely-shucked corn Saran-wrapped up and ready for purchase next to the ears in their unshucked state. Was it some kind of code? Was I in the middle of a sting and didn't realize it? The suspense is killing me ...

[haleysings.livejournal.com]

That's....wow. Bizarre. XD What I like is that it sounds rather similar to "is there a doctor in the house??" That, and...I wonder what the chances were that there was a professional corn-shucker in the store...

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

I was wondering whether it was some manager's way of tweaking his visiting dad or something. It was only one other woman and I in produce at the time, and we looked at each other and giggled ... and nothing seemed to happen.

[haleysings.livejournal.com]

Ooh, I bet it WAS some sort of prank by someone that worked at the store...

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

Why am I not surprised? :-)

Because I have that kind of a rep...?

Mmmm, corn on the cob. Yummy. I'd rather shuck it before it gets cooked, personally; afterwards, the shucks are often too hot to handle.

Was I in the middle of a sting and didn't realize it?

Let's go with that theory. But what kind of sting? Was someone trying to pass off livestock corn for sweet corn, designed for human consumption?

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

Let's go with that theory. But what kind of sting? Was someone trying to pass off livestock corn for sweet corn, designed for human consumption?

Or perhaps ... [FX theremin] genetically-modified super-corn? Corn whose husks were so tough and protective that only the skills of a [reverb] Professional Corn-Shucker [/reverb] could possibly handle them, preventing them from ... uh ... from ... uh ... sitting there and being inedible?

[Note from editor: scenario needs work.]

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

Okay, picture this:

Bruce Willis in a grocery store....

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

      "Attention, whoever you are. This channel is reserved for emergency calls only..."

      "No effing sh*t, lady. Do I sound like I'm paging a corn-shucker?"

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

Not me! I don't work there! :-)

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

"Well, technically, sir...."

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

Whoops. Yippee-ki-yay. [rides off into sunset]

[evil-little-dog.livejournal.com]

[editor] Needs a love scene.

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

      "What about this husking bee? I don't want to go."
      "We're going. It's very important."
      "Important for what? Okay, it will give us a chance to shuck in public, but what else?"
      "I wouldn't want you losing any more sleep over me."
      "Believe me, if and when I ever find myself over you, the last thing I'll be thinking about is sleeping."

[marynachaotica.livejournal.com]

I would have yelled out "HERE I COME TO SAVE THE DAAAAY! Where's the corn?"

*lol* Then again we Missourians do have an odd sense of humor.

[nebroadwe.livejournal.com]

My sample set of Missourians is small, but it does bear out that contention. :-)

BTW, the idea of a Professional Corn-Shucker Mighty-Mousing into the produce section of the local market provoked fits of laughter from a few offline locals, which helps to justify my LJ habit. Thanks much!

[marynachaotica.livejournal.com]

*wicked grin* Hey I do what I can! I'm actually rather mild, compared to most other Missourians. My odd sense of humor tends to sneak up and goose the unsuspecting.